My White Knight
by Ayla C. Raspus
Summary: I never really imagined that being saved so many times by the same person could get so irritating...but was i going to do? He was kinda growing on me drcox/OC A.U.
1. Chapter 1: My Bad Day

**A.N: soooo.....Hiya! First Scrubs story a little A.U., and maybe a bit OOC...cause...well lets face it....who can completely replicate what an actor does on screen, i ask you? lol But really enjoy....it's a lttle different for me but we'll see how it turns out. **

**Disclaimer: i own nothing, cept for my plot and character. **

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1: My Bad Day

I never thought a beeper could signify the beginning of a very long and bad day. I hadn't even been in the hospital when I was paged, I had been sleeping. It was my only day off in a long time and yet I still had to go back into work at 6 o'clock in the morning. It could've possibly been stage one of my very bad day.

By the time I had gotten to the hospital, dawn was already breaking and the sun was brightly illuminating my path. I wasn't excited to see the sign of the hospital as I approached slowly. It seemed I should be rushing, but the page didn't offer a lot of information as to why I had to be called into the Intensive Care Unit. I was quick by the time I entered the hospital, jumping on the elevator and riding my way to the ICU.

Although I had worked in the ICU before pediatrics, I wasn't used to the layout of Sacred Heart's ICU and I struggled to find the room that had occupied one of my patients. Once I did, I sighed loudly, seeing her strapped to many cords wasn't my idea of a welcome.

"Well it's about time you got here; take your sweet time did you?" I rolled my eyes. I had worked with Dr. Perry Cox several times in med school but I wasn't exactly used to his sarcasm. I turned to meet him as he handed me the chart I was looking for.

"Why are her vitals so low?" I hadn't expected any of this. Jamie Martinez was only 6 years old, and when her aunt first brought her in we were only treating her for appendicitis.

"She might just be having a reaction to the surgery, but we stabilized her for the moment. It looks like right now, we might lose her." I paused and looked up at Dr. Cox, he wasn't joking. No one was joking about this. Jamie's aunt was sitting in the glass incased room, holding her nieces hand with sincere affection.

"She's so young…and her parents?" I wasn't sure on what to do next. I could stay and watch her with a keen eye, or I could leave and spend the rest of my day off in bed wondering what would happen to poor Jamie.

"Aunt tried to call, but apparently their hotel in Mexico doesn't know where they are. They're MIA." Dr. Cox didn't seem pleased about this and neither was I. I was more of a mother to Jamie then her own parents were. I felt so horrible to see her so helpless. "If she goes you can't blame yourself….remember that." Dr. Cox left my side to attend to his many other tasks. I leaned against the counter behind me and held Jamie's chart underneath my arm as I pondered what I could do to keep Jamie alive.

I spent the next several hours in a chair in the nurses' station, watching closely as Jamie just slipped into her potentially fatal coma. Jamie's aunt would notice me several times and quickly turn away afraid I would go in there at the last minute and tell her the horrible news. She knew, I knew she did, we all knew that Jamie was going to fade away; I was just waiting for the moment in which I would have to go in there and be the hero. I couldn't be the hero, not today. I wouldn't be anything but the desperate doctor trying to save the life of her 6 year old patient. And then, the inevitable happened. She began to crash.

And there I was, already noon and I was trying desperately to revive Jamie Martinez. It was hard enough trying to do such a task in a small room, but her aunt was standing behind me, desperate tears of her own pouring from her eyes. I tried my best there was no denying that. I checked and did everything I could to keep Jamie alive for the last few minutes of her life. I managed to do so for several heart wrenching minutes, and she survived for at least thirty minutes.

I shouldn't have been surprised when the monitor next to me flat lined loudly. I was in the middle of calling clear for the last time and I froze, inhaled sharply and exhaled slowly. I was fine until Jamie's aunt squealed as she realized what the noise in the room meant. I shuddered a sigh and slowly put the panels down. I looked at the clock and took another deep breath.

"Time of Death…1230." I knew the moment I had spoken the words that Jamie's Aunt wasn't going to take them well. I turned quickly to catch her as she fell to her knees crying. I sunk with her, trying to avoid the situation but not being able to. She cradled her body into my arms and stained my shirt with her tears. I had then realized that I hadn't taken the words well either. I felt the tears sting my eyes but I refused to let them go. If I was going to cry, I wasn't going to do it infront of my peers and coworkers.

"I'm so sorry for your loss…" I could only muster up enough courage to say the words that nobody else could say. For a while I sat with her, leaning against the wall as the nurses and interns helped clean the body.

I sat, after that in the nurses' station, trying to figure out anything I could've done to save that girls life. But there wasn't anything I could've done. I sat staring at the now empty room where the bed had been remade and there would be another patient who had no clue what happened to the previous occupant of the bed.

I had never lost a patient like that. Not a young patient anyway. I picked pediatrics for that sole reason that I wouldn't have to lose someone like that again. I guess I was wrong. I sighed and glanced at the clock. I had spent the last few hours moping about in my own sorrow. I could've used them to at least sleep some.

"Dr. Wilson, I expect you have at least some reason as to why you're still sitting in my ICU?" Dr. Bob Kelso had snuck up behind me, startling me out of my chair and on to my feet within seconds. I cleared my throat and fixed my shirt before I tried to explain exactly what it was that I was doing. To tell the truth I hadn't a clue what I was doing either.

"Ah…come on Bobbo, give a girl a break alright. Now I know that's hard for you since your heart was eaten alive that one monster back in the 1800s and all, but you got to atleast believe you can." Dr. Cox was quick to my rescue, sarcastic as it may be, but of course I couldn't muster enough courage after that to defend my self.

"Well now, since you and Doctor Cox are such good friends, how about we do you guys a little favor, shall we. You see one of the attendings tripped and broke his leg yesterday so we're one man short on emergency staff. How would you like to be apart of our team down here? I'm sure the girls up in pediatrics would understand," I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. What I ever I would say wouldn't be considered anyway and maybe I needed more practice with death.

"Great choice, kiddo. I'll see you tomorrow at eight thirty." Kelso had walked away before I could even say anything. I groaned in frustration and turned to leave. I should have been going home any way.

" Since you've been moping around for the past several hours I might as well share a little secret with you. Everybody has to go sometime. It was just her time, and it's sad when it's someone so young but it's just one of those things that we have to live and learn from. You can't blame yourself for what happened, and if you do you'll just let it get the best of you and that's something you can never come back from…" I paused for a moment, staring at Dr. Cox's sincerest face and nodded, stuffing my hands in my pockets and reaching for my keys within them.

"I'll try and remember that…" I turned away, deciding that going home would probably the best thing I did all day. I wasn't going to like looking at the incredibly sick older people in the ICU tomorrow. I had gotten used to looking at painfully sick children for the past 5 years, and even that was still hard to do. At least I had Dr. Cox to keep me from killing myself, and I realize that that's just hoping for too much. Dr. Cox didn't seem like the type of guy who "cared" about his fellow doctors' feelings.

I reached the exit to the hospital before I knew it, excited when I finally walked out the door and spotted my small yet cozy car from the steps. I jogged down the steps and let my body carry me to the set of four wheels. I wasn't really paying attention to be honest, which makes the next few moments crucial to the ending of my very bad day.

I felt all air release its self from my chest as I hit the pavement and I gasped in surprise. I listened to the sounds around me, all other senses unavailable to myself. I heard a siren wiz past my right ear and felt the wind that followed quickly afterwards. I gasped in surprise, as soon as I had gotten my breath back, I had almost been hit by an ambulance. The body on top of me released the pressure and sat up slightly, sitting on top of me.

"Are you okay?" I wasn't going to lie, the man sitting on top of me had earned the right to be there. Luckily for him he was good looking too. I sighed loudly, still hard of breathing and shifted under his weight.

"I think I'd be better if you weren't sitting on top of me…I think your crushing my pelvis." It was unfortunate that I had to say it but, I couldn't just let him sit there forever (even if I had wanted him to.)

"Oh sorry," He climbed off, the green scrubs clad doctor and stood quickly, extending a hand to me so I could be helped to my feet. I quickly assessed the situation, realizing that the ambulance that had come whirling by had almost hit a few other pedestrians in the midst of avoid hitting me and the doctor in front of me.

"Aw man," I hissed, looking to my right arm, realizing there was a large shard of glass protruding from it.

"Here, we should go suture that up and get you home…" He was friendly enough as he nodded towards the entrance of the hospital. Again, I felt my self dreading going back in there. I would be stuck there for another hour or so and I wouldn't get home until late. It was an unending cycle. I swear this hospital was going to be the death of me.


	2. Chapter 2: My First Day

**a/n: so it toook me FOREVER to update this one....i was blocked....sucks. But i got out of town for a day and it helped me. So i changed my mind about the pairings...cause i honostly can't see Turk with out Carla...so it's going to be /OC instead...cause we all love . :D enjoy..please excuse any grammatical errors or OOCness...lol **

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Chapter Two:

I couldn't figure out what I was looking at. It could've either been my car smashed between the side of the hospital and an ambulance, or it couldn't have been. It wasn't my call to make, but coming down to the moment; it sure was looking like my brand new car. I felt at that moment that the entire hospital was watching my reaction or they could've just been staring at me. I was dripping blood from my arm and my car had be demolished in the ambulances attempt to miss hitting me.

"You know we should probably get you inside so you stop bleeding on the pavement, but that's only a suggestion…" The doctor who had pushed me out of the way was trying to pull me inside against my will. It wasn't hard to say that I was frozen to the spot and nearing the point of a total mental break down. He sighed loudly and irritably as I chose to sit on the floor in a shocked heap rather than follow his advice.

"Is it possible that my whole world could collapse at any moment…" I finally forced myself to speak. I wasn't directing the words at any particular somebody but that good old ball of sunshine Dr. Perry Cox happened to be the one who hear it.

"Well now, I wouldn't go too far as to say your whole world. You still have your job, in which you will spend the next several years unwillingly tending incredibly sick patients of every age with every possible diagnosis. And no, that's not the only thing you have going for yourself, your obviously a very…attractive young woman, you could very well land your self a young stud and settle down…" I glanced up at him slowly, uncertain if I should kick his feet out from underneath him so he'll shut up and leave me alone. He shrugged and stuffed his hands in his lab coat pockets, staring down at me with very prodding eyes.

"Why are you out here?" I asked, forcing the words so they weren't as harsh as my thoughts. He shrugged again and nodded towards the very doctor who had pushed me away from certain death. I wish he wouldn't have.

"Gandhi over there told me you refused medical help, to which my instant thought was why hell you were not paying attention when you were crossing the street next to the emergency entrance of a hospital. You are possibly the most stubborn woman I have ever met. Come on lets go get you sewed up…" As if he realized I wasn't going to move from my spot on the street, he bent down and swooped me up in possibly one of the most uncomfortable holds known to man.

I couldn't tell if Dr. Cox was as uncomfortable as I was that he was carrying me through the hospital bridal style or that I was extremely heavy and he couldn't handle my weight. Today sucked.

"Alright, just stay here and don't go wandering off now and getting yourself hit by ambulances," He was talking to me as if I was a child, he was starting to piss me off, not that I wasn't already so down in the dumps that everything I saw irritated me, including the man who had saved my life.

"I was going to get you in here one way or another," I glared at the open door way as he entered the room pushing a chart of the necessary tools need to sew up the wound I had received outside the hospital.

"It's not even that bad, I think a simple bandage would suffice, and then I can go home so I can deal with this crap again tomorrow."

"Well now, you're welcome, but I get the feeling that you're not as happy as I am that I saved your life. Well if it's for any reference: my name is Dr. Turk and I like sugar free chocolate," I rolled my eyes and tuned out the rest of the time he had spent in the room.

After Dr. Turk finished sewing my arm back to one piece, I left to assess the damage done to my car, which I knew wasn't going to be pretty. I would end up having to walk home or call a cab, but I was far too emotionally drained to care either way.

"Say there, what happened here?" Dr. Cox's shift had just ended I assumed cause he was standing behind me. I looked up at him, trying to piece together that the ambulance had ripped my car in half.

"My car felt the wrath of the ambulance that was trying to hit me…my brand new car…"

"Do you….err…need a ride home?" I wasn't surprised that he was hesitant in asking the question. In fact he had the same look on his face as he did when he was carrying me up through the hospital. It was forced; and I was forced to ask myself: would it kill him to be nice once and a while. The answer: Yes, yes it would

None the less, I wasn't about to walk 16 blocks home so I took the offer, no matter how awkward the car ride was. I hated small cars, and his car was defiantly a small car. It made me feel like my whole body could fit normal length it I laid straight from back to front. Then for some odd reason, I said this:

"You didn't have to carry me." This caused Dr. Cox to frown angrily and turn to look at me. He scoffed and turned his attention back to the road where he continued to look as he shook his head.

"And what, exactly, does telling me that have anything to do with what's going on now? Listen, I realize you had a horrible day, I get it, we've all been there, but you can't let it ruin your life. You're a doctor; you should learn to deal with it like the rest of us. And as for me carrying you, would you rather have had me let you bleed to death in the middle of the street? I was doing Gandhi a favor…" He seemed a bit put off at the idea of actually being nice to someone, which would explain why he was slowly inching towards his side of his car.

Happily, I didn't answer and we both sat in silence until Dr. Cox dropped me off at my apartment. I was almost free of any other confrontation, seeing as I was already digging a whole deeper and deeper with each word I spoke. Dr. Cox already hated me, I'm sure and I really didn't need another lecture. I pulled on the door handle to exit the death trap when Dr. Cox locked the door.

"Err…could you maybe…." I was frantically pulling on the doors handle, every possible thought running through my head as my claustrophobia kicked in.

"Calm down there, jumpy. We need to have a word before you go…" I groaned loudly, not caring if I offended anybody. "Don't make the mistake of thinking you're the first person who's lost a patient like that. We've all been there in some form or another. Like I've said before, you can't let it get to you."

I blinked, holding the door handle in my hand suddenly frozen with anger. Why I was angry, I had no idea. I avoided eye contact, taking a deep breath so I could prevent myself from losing my control. Dr. Cox was eyeing me, eyes moving from my pursed lips to my grip on the hand of his door where my knuckles were turning white.

"Thanks for the ride…" I mumbled, quickly opening the door and closing it behind me.

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"Here, a peace offering. 12 very delicious sugar free chocolates," I had to force a smile when I walked through the doors of the hospital that morning. Dr. Turk seemed pleased with the gift that I did owe him, even if he liked them or not I was going to be satisfied that I had even granted his simple request. I wasn't completely excited to be at work; still it had its temptations. I wouldn't have to deal with the nurses and other residents upstair, which probably pushed me through the final door way to the ICU.

"Dr. Wilson, good morning. Still in a horrible mood?" I had unfortunately ran into Dr. Cox, whom despite my frantic attempts to forget the events of the prior night, managed to remember that I had been a complete jerk to him. Maybe to him I was simply acting like any other trauma ridden person, but to me, I was simply acting on impulse. Things I would normally hold to myself were making themselves clearly visible in my attempts to hide my pure shock.

"I should apologize for last night…I was being completely rude; after all you did give me a ride home and I never really thanked you for that…" I began as he began walking, probably in an attempt to get away from me.

"Sure you thanked me…when you got out of the car you said thanks for the ride. Or is that not considered a thank you these days…" I frowned as he turned to me, eyebrows raised. I shook my head and he scoffed.

"No, I said that only in anger. Which, by the way, I must also say I'm sorry for, I had no intention of taking out my anger on you…" I paused to take a deep breath, preparing myself for a long winded speech as to why he should accept my apology. Of course, I always ended up being interrupted by something or another.

"You know I would really love to stand here and hear you just chat chat away, but I'm afraid that there's a room full of very sick people I need to take care of. Besides, my newbie senses are tingling…excuse me." I raised my eyebrow as Dr. Cox took one step to the left and a body followed crashing to the floor as he fell forward. I stood watching confused as the doctor who had fallen quickly hopped up.

"Damn, I thought I was going to get you that time…" He sighed, looking to where Dr. Cox originally was standing to find the spot completely abandoned. "How does he keep doing that? I swear he's a ninja." I shook my head and quickly took a chart one of the nurses handed to me.

"It's possible…" I answered, sighing as I flipped through the charts slowly. He joined me at my side looking at me curiously before he frowned.

"I don't know you, do I?" He asked, offering a hand for me to shake. I took it and shook my head with another forced smile.

"No, we've never met," I replied. He smiled oddly and pushed his hair out of his face while he leaned against the counter of the nurses' station.

"Well…allow me to introduce myself, Dr. John Dorian at your service…" I scoffed and nodded in acknowledgement before turning towards the patient I was supposed to be attending a long time ago. I didn't have time to be hit on by some on I just met. I had much more important things to be doing, I just had to figure that out first. I should probably start looking for a new car.


	3. Chapter 3: My Worst Enemies

_**a.n: So I am back. Hi. I started school like three weeks ago and i've been super busy. So busy i hadn't had the time to even look at my stories. I started college. Blegh...but i love it. **_

_**Any way, this chapter is a little short but i wanna see how many stories i can update by the end of the weekend. This will probably be the only one. Any who, enjoy!  
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Chapter Three: My Worst Enemies

Already it seemed like a much better day than yesterday was. At least Dr. Cox was in a relatively good mood, most likely because he hadn't been bothered once by Dr. John Dorian since the start of his sift. I, on the other hand, not only had the pleasure of having John Dorian follow me around but several minutes after he had showed up Dr. Turk began as well. Separately I probably could've handled them, but together as one power, as one entity, I was royally screwed.

As the morning kept going I found that as long as I kept busy my thoughts followed with it, keeping those of yesterday clear of my mind. I was grateful, too, that I was meeting new people, with this; nothing could pass through that block I had processed on whatever had happened yesterday. Apart from JD, who told me I was to call him that no matter what, and Turk, many of the faces were fresh, once I hadn't seen until the moment I exchanged any type of dialogue with. Most were different from the doctors I knew on the sixth floor. Many of the doctors in the intensive care unit had character; heck even the Janitor had a lot more personality that most of the girls upstairs.

The janitor hadn't been verbal when I had accentually bumped into his shoulder, making his presence known, as I rushed to a different part of the floor. He only seemed to look at me. Other than that, he kept his distance, only coming near me when he absolutely had to, which usually was when I missed the trashcan. It wasn't like I couldn't have picked up the trash that I had thrown myself, but I noticed he would waltz over and push me out of the way to pick it up him while grumbling. I let him do it though; every time I tried to protest he kept growling, like a dog when you try and take its bone away. I wasn't going to lie, it was a little creepy.

"Maybe he likes you?" Turk suggested as he witnessed the even unfolds for the sixth time that morning. I glanced over at him, he was sitting at the opposite side of the nurses' station munching on the candy I had given him, slapping away a nurses hand when she tried to grab a piece. I shook my head tucking a strand of hair behind my ear in the process.

"That's not possible, it looks like he's just…passionate about his job," I answered, shrugging as I watched the janitor lean against the wall down the hall. I couldn't tell, but it seemed that he was watching me out of the corner of my eye.

"Please, the janitor usually doesn't pick up trash unless he absolutely has to, which is almost never. There has to be something about you that he likes, whether it is your looks or something else," Carla, (I had discovered her name when Turk loudly protested that she had taken the box of chocolates away) offered her advice before handing me a chart in which I was ungrateful to receive. I had wanted to go home.

The day seemed longer than it had before. Something about working in an Intensive Care Unit seemed tedious. Obviously I was the only one who thought so. Many of the doctors or interns working here had been working here for a long time and new the routine. I have trouble getting used to things, Mostly things that involve me seeing the same faces on patients every day. It's not like I didn't enjoy seeing the faces, it's just, and I feel heartbroken. Most of the time, these people are here and are going to stay here, for a very long time. In pediatrics, there is only maybe one or two who are intensive care, and they usually stay here. Most of the children I treated didn't stay longer than three days. But that was me.

"Dr. Wilson, I have a quick question of you?" Dr. Bob Kelso asked, coming up behind me, saving me from myself. I turned to face him, studying the irritated look on his face, whether I was with me, I didn't know. "How is it that your father mysteriously showed up this morning and is now, "taking rounds" throughout my hospital like he owns the place?" I took a deep breath.

"I don't have any clue as to what you're talking about. He's just doing his job, anyway," I waited; defending my father against Bob Kelso was another tedious exercise I was getting tired of. It seemed every other week my father was popping up unexpectedly and evaluating random employees in the hospital, in random departments.

"Right now, your father is following Dr. Cox around the hospital," I raised my eyebrows. That couldn't be good. From what I understood, my father and Dr. Cox didn't get along too well. At least, this is what Freddie tells me. I winced noticeably as I thought of the consequences that could possibly unfold in the next ten to fifteen minutes.

"Are we evacuating for an explosion of ego?" I asked, knowing my father well enough that he didn't clash well with someone like Dr. Cox and it didn't look like a happy end. Bob Kelso just stared at me, unamused at my attempt for humor. My worries weren't ceased as Dr. Cox rounded the corner, looking as irritated as I thought he was. He stopped when he saw Dr. Kelso and me, his nostrils flaring as he neared us. I took a quick step to the right as Dr. Cox eyed Dr. Kelso angrily.

I bit my lip, deciding that I'd much rather be working than deal with my father and turned away, quickly flipping open the chart in my hands. I loved my father very much, but there was something about him that reminded me of some kind of wild animal. I don't know which one, but defiantly a wild one.

"Dr. Cox," I heard my father's voice from down the hall, stalling me in the process of trying to escape. I remained silent, trying to find a way to run away from the battle what was about to happen. I felt the pen I had in my hand and smirked, letting my fingers unfold so the pen fell loosely from my hand.

"Oops, I dropped my pen," I mumbled leaning down so I could escape while picked up my pen. Happy that my plan was working, I crawled successfully out of the line of vision before my father could see me. Unfortunately, practically everybody else noticed that I was crawling on the floor.

"Dr. Kelso, wasn't my daughter just standing here?" I heard my father ask followed by a loud groan from who I could only guess was Dr. Cox. I paused, still on all fours and waited to see if Dr. Kelso would sell me out or if he would cover for me.

"Yup, she's on the floor." I knew I hated Dr. Kelso for another reason. I curse silently and looked up from the floor as three heads glanced over. I smiled, picking up the pen I had purposely dropped and standing from my crawl.

"Sneaking off?" My dad asked, crossing his arms. I hated when he crossed his arms, it usually meant that not only was he ticked off at something from work, but he was pissed off with me.

"No, I dropped my pen. I was picking it up before somebody stepped on it," I had lied. Who doesn't lie to their dad? I took a quick look at the other two faces that were staring at me from across the counter. Dr. Kelso was frowning obviously not in the mood for any more jokes, and Dr. Cox seemed to be laughing. No, not seemed. He _was_ laughing. I glared.

"We will talk later, princess." My dad told me, publicly angry. I winced and stepped back, taking a deep breath. He had called me princess, further pushing my humiliation further when Dr. Cox started jumping up and down. Thankfully, I watched as Dr. Kelso and my father left, putting aside the fact that they were angry with each other to happily have a conversation down the hall. I was almost afraid to look back a Dr. Cox, but I knew I had to.

"You know, I was so confused on how I could further embarrass you while you're here, but now I see." I groaned audibly, and turned to face him. He seemed happy, I obviously was not. "Oh you can whine all you want _princess, _but it's gonna happen." He frowned, nodding his head before he turned on his heal to emphasize there was nothing I could say to make him reconsider. Even if I did, it was still gonna be a long time before I can convince him to stop. Hell, I've known my dad my entire life and he still torments me. Now I have two. I have two enemies.

And they were the worst kind.


	4. Chapter 4: My Problem With Drinking

**a.n: i'm back. :D this after noon during SPN 101, i got struck with inspiration. I like this chapter. :D I hope you do too. Peace Love and Chicken grease. RandR **

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Chapter Four: My Problem With Drinking.

I never forget things. Or at least I rarely forget things. So you'd think I'd remember what happened last night after I got off of work. I have absolutely no idea. I remember walking to my car with JD and Turk in tow. They were trying to get me to go and have a drink with them. I remember this because the way they were looking at me kind of reminded me of "The Shining" where the little girls are at the end of the hallway? I was unconditionally afraid of that movie. It mostly had to do with a phase my dad went through when I was younger. We call it the "Stephen King Crisis of 89'", The Crisis for short. There are a lot of bad memories connected to that crisis. But anyway:

"What are you doing tonight?" JD had been the first to speak, obviously because I had this weird expression on my face. I had probably been thinking about the crisis.

"I had planned on going to bed after doing tons of paper work. Why?" I had tried to not make it sound rude, but it was already the end of the day and I was extremely irritated and tired. Irritated because Dr. Cox had continuously bothered me until the ends of our shifts in which he ceased to speak to me.

"Forget paper work, we do it all the time. Come have a drink with us!" Turk happily suggested, not waiting for an answer before he steered me in the opposite direction of my car. I wasn't much of a drinker.

Maybe, that's why I forgot the other events of the night. I had a drink, or several maybe. This could also explain the certain throbbing headache I was experiencing and the new sensation that felt as though I was going to puke on my bed.

The last time I drank heavily was several years ago at my cousin's wedding. The only reason I drank then was because the best man was a complete asshole, and wouldn't leave me alone for the remainder of the night. Unfortunaly I ended up waking up alongside him the next morning, feeling exactly the same way I did now.

Come to think of it….

I knew I was in my apartment, that was a given. I know my sheets. Unfortunately, there was a very awkward draft sneaking up my leg and usually I wear bottoms to bed, so I usually don't feel a draft. I was very afraid to open my eyes.

I contemplated it for a while, thinking that maybe I had just come home and stripped nude and gone to bed. Or that I threw up all over myself and had to take my clothes off! That seemed a much better hypothesis than the one I was cooking up now. My theory was tested wrong though, when I felt him shift next to me, still asleep. It was then that I realized there was an arm strewn across my chest, making it impossibly hard to breathe.

Oh god. I had done it again. I had gotten drunk and slept with someone. The question was who?

Don't you find it funny when you forget something and then something happens and your memory suddenly becomes jogged? That's what happened to me. I was hoping it was all a dream; A horrible, horrible dream. This, in this case, would be considered a nightmare. Here's the reason why:

Somehow, JD and Turk had convinced me to go to the bar with them, even after I explained the severity of my actions when I drink. Their explanation: "We want to see that!" And with that the drinks came one right after the other. I don't think I even paid for half of them. About halfway through JD and Turk's "Let's get Sadie drunk" idea, we were joined by another member. All I knew was that he was hospital staff. I hardly remember what happened next.

I do remember calling my dad though, Yelling at him for some reason or another, possibly bringing up the crisis in there somewhere. That conversation went on for a while. After that I can't remember things other than the guy that joined bought me a couple of drinks too. I could remember a distinct laugh. But it wasn't a normal laugh, it was a sarcastic laugh. A laugh that everyone was deadly afraid of. Oh dear god…

I opened my eyes this time, first glancing at the clock to check the time. I had to be at work in an hour. I winced as I turned over, staring at the man that had brought me back to my place, and for lack of better phrase: sexed me up.

To my surprise it was David Bowie staring back at me. Yeah, I was looking at my Labyrinth poster, but it was much better than facing the truth next to me. Besides I love that movie. Anyway, back to my crisis. I rolled over, slowly so I didn't stir him and felt like weeping. If I didn't know any better, I'd say that whatever happened last night was going to be held over my head for the next decade or so. I hate my life.

Again, I had that sudden feeling of memory rush back to me and the event that took place in the this bedroom made me want to burn my bed. And the realization that it's going take several months to get the stink of Dr. Cox out of my sheets; it's like a bad stain. And for that matter, its going to take several years before I get the thought out of my mind!

I needed to be to work in 45 minutes, which meant I was gonna have to get up. But I didn't want to do that and wake up the man I most hated in this moment in time. Slowly, I slipped underneath the arm that was still around me and ran to the bathroom. I showered and dressed in 20 minutes. Even after the shower, I still smelled of Dr. Cox. I was disgusted. When I left, Dr. Cox was still asleep. I just left him there, trying to forget about everything.

"Good morning, Sadie," JD and Turk both greeted as I walked through the hospital doors that morning: that sad, sad morning. They knew something, I knew they did. They had smirks on their faces.

"Not really," I replied, flipping open my first chart of the day for my first patient. They followed my gaze, hoping I'd look them in the eye. I wasn't going to give them the satisfaction.

"How was the rest of your night?" Turk asked, obviously trying not laugh. I glared and they paused. Sure this was the first time they had seen me mad, but what were they going to expect, that I was gonna go on a tell all rampage?

"It's not funny. I can't believe you set me up like that!" I grumbled, still peeved. They paused and looked at me.

"We didn't set you up, Sadie. You went off your own free will." JD said, still looking amused.

"Well you could've stopped me! It's embarrassing. You have no idea what I'm going to go through…" Of course the moment I spoke is the moment he walked through the hospital doors, looking like the same old Dr. Cox. He approached me happily, or rather happy that he could torment me.

"Good Morning, Cinderella. Was it me or did I rock your world last night?" I groaned, he went _there_. I sighed and looked at him.

"You know honestly I can't remember a thing so…you must not have been that great." He paused as I smirked, putting his hand to his chest in mock pain.

"Ouch, you know that hurts it really does, but as long as we're on that subject, as long as I got mine I really couldn't care if you remember or not. Now if you don't mind, I'm gonna spread the news of your embarrassing drinking problem while I go tend to patients." I followed him angrily, there was no way I had slept with him.

"You really think your being funny don't you?" I asked, causing him to stop and turn around, smirking. I winced, maybe that wasn't the right way to begin an argument.

"Actually, yes I do. Somehow I find making your life miserable hilarious. Although it's not as funny as when Denise over there does it," I looked to JD who waved happily before going back to his work. I rolled my eyes.

"If you tell _anybody _about what happened last night, you'll regret ever stepping foot in this hospital." My threats were usually empty, and when I did threaten somebody I wasn't the best at it. Dr. Cox, obviously, saw through the threat and started laughing.

"Puh-leeze, you actually think I'd share something like this with the whole hospital? As good as an idea as it sounds; I can torture you enough about it without having the need to spread it all over the hospital that you're a slutty drunk…" I felt my mouth drop in offense. He seemed to like this.

"I am not a slutty drunk! I may be a little lax when I'm drunk but I am no slut." I had to admit my voice was a little louder than it needed to be, and some of the nurses were looking curiously over at me and Dr. Cox. He raised his eyebrows and clutched the chart he was holding to his chest. I felt my face get red, and I took a deep breath.

"Alright then, well, if we're done with that little trip into your deepest inner thoughts. I got work to do. Oh…and I think I left my socks at your apartment," He smirked, raising his eyebrows in amusements as I leaned against the counter in anguish.

I don't know if I mentioned this before…but…I hate my life.


	5. Chapter 5: My Five Seconds

_**a.n.: Aren't you proud of me? I've updated this story TWICE in one week. I'm proud of me. call me butter cause i'm on a roll! lol wow that was lame. Anyway, i had to add a dramatic chapter to keep up with the dramody aspect i'm trying to shoot actually might be the only chapter that's drama-ish :D it might suck and please excuse all grammatical errors..i'm not one for editing. :D read and review. por favor **_

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Chapter Five: My Five Seconds

There was a thing that brought my old college roommate and me closer, and it simply involved crying in a closet. I hadn't done this in years, at least not since medical school, but somehow I found myself in the supply closet. Now before I go any further I wasn't crying because throughout the day I had been constantly asked what happened with Dr. Cox. I was crying because for the first time in my life, I had felt helpless.

I never felt helpless like this before; not even in the past couple of days when I believed the whole world was against me. Know I knew the whole world was against me, and it seemed like today couldn't possibly get any worse. I know I thought that when I woke up, with a hangover, next to Dr. Cox, was the last bad thing that was going to happen to me today. I was officially wrong.

Still I couldn't find the strength to pull myself out of the closet and walk towards his room. I took a deep breath; my father had been really great to me, although I complained a lot. There was just still no way this was happening.

I may have said a lot of things to make him seem like a horrible person, but he wasn't like Dr. Cox. He had emotions, he had a human side. It was that human side I was gonna miss the most. The worst part, Dr. Kelso put Dr Cox on as his primary physician. Wasn't their some kind of rule that complete jerks couldn't take care of your very sick father.

My father had been sick for awhile and the only people who knew about it were my biological mother, me, and my father's life-partner. My family was very strange, but I loved them and we were normal for us. I never even spent time with my biological mother, but we were as close as any other mother and daughter. It was harder to relate to other children because of our situation. I resented my dad's partner just because he was there and made it seem that I wasn't normal.

I heard the closet door open and I quickly wiped away the tears from my eyes before turning to face the doctor in front of me. I was on my break so no one could have complained of me not doing my job. But the doctor in front of me knew exactly why I was in there. She knew exactly why she was in there.

"Elliot?" I asked, using the sleeve of my lab coat to wipe away the makeup that had run down my face.

"Oh my gosh, Sadie!" She ignored the fact that I had been crying to embrace me tightly, possibly just enough to squeeze another sob out of me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, obviously meaning the closet but of course the question was too vague to be construed as such.

"I work here, duh! What are you doing here?" I raised my eyebrows, and waited for her to notice the lab coats lovely calligraphy. She realized it within seconds and nodded to understand.

"Any particular reason you're in the closet?" She asked, implying our rule instated in college. Yes, Elliot Reed was my college roommate. She understood me, well mostly. I actually hadn't told her that I had two dads. But I guess she'll find out soon enough.

"I think I'm gonna go check on my dad," I changed topic, although what I said pretty much implied what she was asking. I pushed past her and walked out of the closet and down the hall towards the wing my father was residing in.

I took a deep breath before I entered. Only my dad lay in his bed, staring up at the ceiling as Dr. Cox stood over him, writing in his chart. I stood in the door way for a moment before walking into the room. My dad turned his head to watch me while Dr. Cox still stared at his chart. I stopped on the opposite side of his bed, smiling while I gripped his hand in mine.

"How you doing dad?" I asked, more in a whisper than out loud. I had shared what was possibly the worst night ever with Dr. Cox; he didn't need to see my family moments. He flipped his chart closed, and cleared his throat. I looked up at him, the expression on his face was not what I was expecting. I squeezed my dad's hand before I cleared my own throat.

"Sadie, Can I, uh, talk to you for a moment?" He asked, nodding his head toward the door. I followed hesitantly.

"Not looking good is it?" I asked, watching as Dr. Cox took a deep breath.

"The, uh, cancer spread throughout his body. It's just a matter of hours now. I'm so sorry. I called your family. They'll be here as soon as they can. Why don't you, stay with him for awhile?" I felt tears sting my eyes as I shook my head.

"I have work to do," I mumbled, after taking in a deep breath to stop the tears. I walked away, hearing Dr. Cox sigh in frustration. The hospital never looked so bleak before and from this moment on I would forever associate this wing with my father's death, even if it was still hours to come.

I kept to myself the rest of the day, mostly. I involved myself in conversations with Turk and JD, caught up with Elliot and poured my heart out to Carla. Carla, I found was becoming a fast friend just like Turk and JD were, and yet I couldn't find myself to share that my father was facing impending doom. All I could muster when she asked how he was doing was a mumbled, "Fine" although I knew she didn't believe it.

"Maybe you should go lie down. It'll take your mind off things," Carla suggested, putting a hand comfortingly on my shoulder.

"I'm fine, really I am. I just need to get back to work and focus." I smiled, still not convincing anybody on what was happening. I left though, towards the break room. It was empty when I got there, which gave me space and silence to think. I sat down on the couch and sighed, leaning back while I closed my eyes.

On one hand my dad had suffered his whole life dealing with this, it was a miracle that he hadn't died ages ago, but he was still my dad and no matter how I looked at it I was gonna miss him more than anything. He was his own person and he never let anyone stand up to him, including his own daughter. But I knew everything he had done for me wasn't going to be a complete waste.

It was then that my beeper went off. It had only been a good hour and a half since I had spoken with Dr. Cox and yet somehow I wasn't surprised that it did. The page was from Dr. Cox, no message just the number. Slowly, I got up and walked down the hall. He was waiting for me outside my father's room, eyebrows raised.

"Yeah?" I asked, as I approached him, holding up my beeper for emphasis. He took a deep breath and cleared his throat, obviously uncomfortable with the conversation. I raised my eyebrows.

"Don't you think you should be in there with your dad?" he asked, quietly so as to not show an ounce of the sincerity I could tell Carla had forced him into showing.

"And do what? Sit and watch him die. I do enough of that with people I hardly know and I still have a hard time dealing with that. But now it's my own father, just think how that's going to make me feel. I can't…" I told him, trying my hardest to not look in the room where my family was gathered around my dad's sleeping form. He bit his lip, trying to hold back some rant. I knew it was inevitable; it was going to come out anyway.

"Dear God, Sadie, the man is your father and you refuse to go sit in there with him. I seriously doubt this is even about him dyeing not to mention that you're a doctor, you should be able to deal with these types of things every day and yet your standing there moping around…" I glared as he took a deep breath, catching himself before he continued.

"Sadie? I hope I'm not interrupting anything?" my mother put her hand on my shoulder and I spun to meet her as she stepped forward to look at me in the eye. After all the crazy stuff she and my dad have been through, she still loved him, which surprised me, because he could be a royal pain. I shook my head and waited for her to continue. My dad wanted to see me, alone. Great.

The room had cleared when I entered, and yet I could feel the eyes of my friends from outside the door, watching what I'd do next. I adjust the blankets over his body, twiddled with some machines before my father's shaky hands reached up to stop mine from working. I took a deep breath and sat in the chair next to his, cupping his hand in mine.

We never spoke, but I knew, in a way, what he wanted to say without speaking. He never wanted me to blame him for anything, which I didn't. He loved me, and was proud of what I had become. The next five seconds were somewhat of a blur, but the next thing we knew he was gone. He went peacefully. But the last five seconds I spent with my dad were the most important thing that day. I will always cherish those five seconds of just silence.

I felt nothing, which is sad. I was sad, but I didn't cry. Maybe it had to do with what Dr. Cox told me. He was right, I was far too emotional when it came to patients and yet with my dad I had wanted nothing to do with being with him in his last few hours.

That's how I ended up in the supply closet again. This time I locked myself in, if at all possible. I was slumped on the floor staring at the door, foot pressed up against it to prevent anyone from walking in and discovering me. Still no tears, quiet sobs, but not tears.

Finally the door opened and Dr. Cox was staring down at me with an awkward look on his face, holding a cup of coffee.


	6. Chapter 6: My Cup of Coffee

_**A/N: I'm back!!!! Lol it's been a little hectic. I'm nearing the end of my first semester of college, so finals are coming up..yay me. but not really. Well i enjoy this chapter, i hope you do too. Read it then click the button at the bottom of the page and review it. And as always : please try to ignore any grammatical errors. I really hate editing and therefor dont do it. **_

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Chapter 6: My Cup of Coffee

Dr. Cox took one long sip of his coffee, staring at me from the corner of his eye. He obviously wasn't here to offer any condolences. I took a deep breath and stood up, wiping any stray tears and smudges of mascara that happened to be left on my face. I fixed my jacket stood up straight and walked forward, ignoring the obvious arrogance in his presence. Some part of me wanted to believe that this man had a soul, yet the louder voice in my head was screaming at me to knock his arm so he'd spill the steaming hot brown liquid on his unusually tight white t-shirt. And I did.

I wasn't surprised at myself; I had wanted to do something both physically and emotionally painful to him ever since I woke up with his arm thrown across my chest. The man just had it coming. Apparently, he didn't find it so in spirit of redemption but more so in the "I'm so going to kill you for this," spirit. I didn't care; I was utterly and completely emotionless and oblivious to the fact that I had just signed my death warrant.

"Hey did Dr. Cox talk to you yet?" Carla peeked in as I was checking up on a patient. I looked up and smiled, knowing she meant well.

"Sure, we had a nice little chat over coffee." I explained, it wasn't a total lie. She nodded and took the chart I handed to her.

"Good, you look a little happier." She smiled as we walked out of the patients room together, the chart held to her chest as she filed it way shortly afterwards. She was right, although half of me was still dying on the inside; the other half was completely satisfied with what had happened in the supply closet. I chuckled and made my way towards the coffee shop, deciding that reminiscing about spilling Dr. Cox's made me want a cup of my own.

"Hey Sadie, glad I caught you. Turk and I were thinking about going out again tonight, you in?" JD asked, intercepting me as I was making my way down to the coffee shop to fulfill my recent craving.

"I'm going to try and answer this without hurting your feelings. Hell No." I rolled my eyes and stood in line at the coffee counter as JD pouted and Turk popped up to emphasis their disappointment.

"Why not? You had fun last night didn't you?" Turk asked, knowing full well the repercussions of last night.

"Oh yeah, waking up next to my worst enemy was something I had planned on doing. Not to mention the fact that we'd be going out for the second night in a row when I'm still trying to recover from the last time." I explained, albeit sarcastic I was sure I got my point across. They remained silent while I ordered my coffee, trying to come up with a reasonable excuse as to why I should join them again.

Remember when I "accidently" bumped into Dr. Cox, making him spill his coffee all over himself? Well, it seemed it was about time that I received the payback I knew was coming. I never expected this though. Dr. Cox made a point to stand exactly behind me as I spun around with my freshly brewed and served coffee. I grimaced in pain as the coffee trickled down my shirt and onto my skirt, staining the entire outfit I had managed to pull off that day. Turk and JD, slightly stunnded sputtered in laughter, trying to make the best of my situation, although it seemed they were on Dr. Cox's side.

"Well, gee Diana, did I accidently spill your coffee?" He asked, still stained from our earlier encounter.

"Diana?" The man just spilt piping hot coffee on my new blouse and all I can ask is why he called me Diana.

"As in Princess Diana, I'm going with a theme here, try and keep up. And since we're on the subject, since when is it no longer okay to offer condolences anymore?" He growled, crossing his arms over his coffee stained shirt. I glared at him, if he was there to offer condolences, it sure as hell didn't look like it. Still, I had my pride, but I also had the bitchy side of me. So I ignored the question and turned on my heel. I had extra scrubs in my locker upstairs.

"Oh, no, no, you're not avoiding the question." He followed me, and I took a deep breath.

"Just think about that answer for a second. Until then…let the Coffee war begin," I smirked, turning into the ladies locker room as he groaned in protest. I smirked, nodding to Elliot as she shut her locker.

"You and Dr. Cox seem to be getting along," She chuckled, eyeing me as I took the extra scrubs out of my locker.

"Yeah, we're just great friends!" I smirked, quickly changing into my scrubs as Elliot laughed.

"You shouldn't let him get to you." She offered, walking with me as I made my way towards the nurses' station so I could pick up another chart.

"I'm not. I know how to deal with men like him. My dad was just like him," I smiled, grabbing the chart handed to me and walking to the room I was supposed to be in. I had been in there maybe two seconds when Carla popped up next to me, arms crossed an angry scowl on her face.

"You need to talk to Dr. Cox," She told me, stirring a grunt from my patients throat as she adjusted herself so she was sitting.

"What I _need_ to do is schedule a cat scan for Mrs. Stevens, so we can take a peek inside. But, no, I don't need to talk to Dr. Cox" I smiled at my patient who chuckled lightly. I turned away from Carla and left turning towards the nurses' station to process the order for the cat scan.

"You know you seem a bit too happy for someone who's dad just died," Dr. Cox approached me, receiving one big smile in return as I turned to face him.

"I don't for a second believe that you were there to tell me you were sorry. And maybe your right maybe I am just a little too happy for some who's dad just died. But I do know one thing; I have friends who are way taller than you are." I smirked, winking at him as the Janitor poured a small cup of luke warm coffee over his head upon my request a few moment before.

"Thanks Janitor, I'll bring you that book I was talking about," I told him receiving a nod in return.

"What book?" Carla asked, handing Dr. Cox a few paper towels as he stood in silence.

"Reinventing the Body, Resurrecting the Soul: How to Create a New You; It's a self help book, sounded interesting," the Janitor replied, clutching the side of the counter as he leaned on it.

"My mom is a therapist, she owns tons of those things," I explained, receiving a pat from the janitor. I looked at Dr. Cox and smiled.

"Shall I call the coffee war off?" I asked, serious.

"You are one strange person, you know that right? Listen I really am sorry about your dad, believe me. Just go home already, you're ruining my day," He replied. I nodded, and moved forward patting him on the shoulder as a I started to leave. I paused, and turned around.

"Let's just say for a while, neither of us drinks coffee."


	7. Chapter 7: My Super Happy Thanksgiving

_**A/N: Hey everybody! I hope everybody had a wonderful Thanksgiving. i know i did. There's nothing like spending time with family. That being said, i had wanted to post this chapter on thanksgiving DAY but...sometimes you get so busy. and you can't think of anything that it just happens to be posted...three days after Thanksgiving. But alas, the next chapter IS here. And i hope you enjoy it.**_

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Chapter 7: My Super Happy Thanksgiving

"How did this happen?" I could hear Dr. Cox talking, but I never really paid attention. I was too busy wallowing in what was my self pity to even answer his question. I took a deep breath and shrugged my shoulders, biting my lips as no words even came to mind. He was right, how in the world did this happen, AGAIN. I had the day off today, it was supposed to have been relaxing. I was supposed to be cooking dinner at this juncture in time.

I used to love Thanksgiving, I think today ruined it, or at least threw me off course of a little bit. Why the hell did he have to show up at my front door? I'm starting to think that maybe, Dr. Cox is out to get me. Or whatever this entails. Maybe it was my fault. Maybe I shouldn't have answered the door wearing nothing but my underwear and an oversized Red Wings jersey my mom's husband got me for Christmas a couple years ago. I hated it.

Maybe I should blame it on Carla. It was her idea to have this whole Thanksgiving feast and suggest that Dr. Cox show up early and help me with all the preparations. Although I do have to admit, I might've been in a little over my head when I offered my apartment and services to this last minute, so w could all have a last minute meal! Then again I have this horrible nature to please people, and I'm completely obsessed with throwing parties. I should have never offered. I just feel so horrible. And yet it's crazy, but, I really enjoyed what just happened. I was so stressed about the whole dinner thing, it kind of just happened.

I don't know what type of noise I made, but whatever escaped my throat caused Dr. Cox to look at me like I was crazy. As if the whole "how'd this happen" again conversation wasn't going to admit that was crazy already. After I had made the noise, I bunched up my blankets and hopped off the bed. I had no idea what my explanation was, or even if words could even be produced. I was incredibly embarrassed.

"Okay, we have got to stop doing this…" I breathed, pulling the blanket up over my chest awkwardly.

"For the love of god, Sadie, this happened once. And it might have not have happened if you weren't dressed as a girl from every man's fantasy," I watched him pause and take a deep breath. "Not to mention that until now, you seemed to be agreeing very loudly to the idea of what you call, 'this.'" I took a deep breath and sat down on the edge of my bed. He was right; I enjoyed all that more than I needed to. Not to mention that he actually used my real name. Not to mention that I actually remembered it this time, no one was drunk.

"Well, whatever, I really don't have the time to deal with this right now. I have to cook a dinner for people who will be showing up any minute now." I scoffed, waddling towards my closet so I could change. I could hear him groan in frustration as he got himself out of my bed.

I changed quickly, fortunately the outfit part of my day, other than the clothes that were currently lying on the bedroom floor. Of course when I walked out, Turk and JD were waiting for me, awkwardly standing in the middle of my entry way, staring at the apartment in awe.

"I think there is a reason why we were never invited over here until now," Turk told me as I approached him.

"I feel like I shouldn't touch anything," JD replied, stuffing his hands in his pockets quickly. I smiled, I was so happy they were here. If they were here that meant Dr. Cox and I couldn't be alone, which as of now is a good thing.

"It's not a museum, but that being said, this room is off limits to you two." I smirked and led them to the living room where Dr. Cox had made himself comfortable, legs propped on the coffee table and drinking a beer.

"I'm glad to see you made yourself at home, Perry," I told him, watching as JD and Turk followed suit. Dr. Cox looked up at me, raising his eyebrows as he took one look at my dress.

"What are we? A movie from the 50s?" He asked, still eying the black and white poka-dot dress I had on. I guess it resembled something like a dress from the 50s, but I liked it.

"What time does this thing get started?" Turk asked, looking at his watch impatiently.

"Why are you hungry? I'm getting ready to put the turkey in if you want to help," I rolled my eyes as Turk began to laugh. Of course. "Well, if anybody needs me I'll be in the kitchen, I guess." I didn't mind, I need time to clear my head after my recent romp in the hay with the man I actually vowed to hate to no end. You know, to honor my dad. However, I doubt my dad ever did this with his sworn enemy. I wonder if he ever thought about it. It's too late to ask him now.

I could hear the T.V. in the next room; I hardly ever watched that thing. It was good to see that it was getting some use.

"Say there, Cinderella. Just a quick question while your slaving away to make a dinner I'm pretty sure I'm going to hate. How come a gal like you hasn't gotten married yet?" I looked up from the potatoes I was peeling and took a deep breath.

"I don't know. Why do you even care?" I replied, throwing the potatoes in the boiling water. This wasn't an awkward conversation.

"Oh I don't know. It felt like something you'd ask the person you just slept with." I hated him. Who asks a person that? It's not like I've never gotten close. I think the closest I've been to marriage was actually standing at the altar, white dress and everything. I'm very indecisive, I know this, but the man I was supposed to marry, was a complete ass.

Which brings me to the way Perry asked the question: 'a gal like me,' Was that supposed to be a compliment? Did he think I was special? Hell if I knew, or even care. I shouldn't care, right? The man just happened to ask a question. It wasn't meant to convey a hidden message, was it?

"Sadie, there's a strange man at your door!" JD called from the other room, obviously sounding a bit off. I didn't hear a knock or a buzzer, and if it was Carla or Elliot JD wouldn't have called hem strange men. Although there was that one time back in college for a costume party that Elliot and I were dared to dress at men…

I walked to the living room, nervous. An unknown man showing up at my door was a little bit unnerving. The last time that happened, I ended up in bed with Dr. Cox again. Carla and Elliot had indeed showed up with the unknown man and were standing beside him, looking at him in awe. I guess it could've been because the man was incredibly good looking, not to mention he happened to be in the military. Who was he? Of course these things hit me a little late before I realize I actually know the person.

"Oh my gosh, Steve?" I asked, still very unsure about the entire situation, which included a lot of my day.

"Hey," I raised my eyebrows, the man goes on a two year tour overseas and all he can say is 'hey', what is the problem with the men in this group. "I'm home." Obviously. Without thinking first I ran towards him, hugging him around the neck tightly. After a while in the hug, I could hear the awkward clearing of a throat from behind us.

"I'm sorry, this is my younger brother, Steve. Steve these are the people I work with at the hospital." I announced, exchanging names before I headed back to the kitchen. Dr. Cox was still standing there, sipping on another beer. I resumed my cooking duties before Steve waked in eyeing Perry with a very awkward glare.

"I didn't know you had a brother," Carla told me as we put the final touches on the few dishes that needed to be placed out on the table before we could eat.

"He's been away a lot. Training, then the tour overseas. I hardly get to see him. I'm surprised he even showed up now. We never have a lot to say to each other," I explained, placing the final casserole dish on the table.

I had never had a day that I wanted to be over more than I did this one. Although as much as I hate to admit, I did have a little bit of fun, running late and sleeping with Dr. Cox excluded. Thanksgiving wasn't going to be so bad after all. I felt proud of the work I had done. Usually I spent Thanksgiving by myself or at the hospital. It was great to have people sitting around a dining table that was hardly used except to get mass amounts of paper work done.

The table was so vibrate and full of life. My little brother sitting at the head of the table as he cut into the turkey, Turk and JD being Turk and JD. And…Dr. Cox was staring at me? What? If you can imagine how surprised I was, multiply that by one thousand. I don't think it was intended to be like that. I doubt he wanted me to see and I was possibly the only one who did see it. But, at the end of the argument in my head, all I could really think of was how much I didn't mind that he was looking at me…

What the hell is wrong with me?


	8. Chapter 8: My Food Poisoning

_**A/N: it's taken me a while to get this written, and i think i MIGHT be on a roll for a while but who knows since I'm in week three of my second semester of college! Any way i know this chapters gonna be like a weird left turn, but oh well. i like it. Read!! **_

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Chapter Eight: My Food Poisoning

"Steve, remind me why you're here again?"

"I'm here to make sure you see a doctor. You might have the flu, besides I have an interview later on."

"Steve, I _am _a doctor. I'm perfectly fine. I could look in the mirror and tell you again if you'd like me to be actually

seeing a doctor. I just had some icky food last night that's all."

"Right, do me a favor and throw away all those Thanksgiving leftovers you keep eating. They've been there about 2 months already and it's kind of gross that you ate that." Turk had happened to be walking by when he overheard my brothers and my conversation and he looked at us with a disgusted frown on his face.

"You ate nasty thanksgiving food?" He asked, trying to process the information quickly.

"No."

"Yes."

I glared at Steve as he smiled, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he waited for me to snap at him. "I'm absolutely positive it was not Thanksgiving leftovers. I think that stuff has turned green and growled at me once." I walked on.

Steve was trying hard to keep up as I made my way through rounds. I swore if he kept shadowing me all day I was going to hurt him. It hadn't been the greatest morning to begin with anyway. Well, I do happen to have a lot of bad mornings, but for a while here everything seemed to be going okay. Steve had, besides the fact that he walked in on me while I was in the bathroom without even bothering to knock, found me flushing away evidence that had to him looked like the disgusting vomit-y remains of old thanksgiving leftovers.

Since then he's been insisting that I see a doctor. While I, on the other hand, kept insisting that I was one and he should shut up and take my word that I was just suffering a little from food poisoning. You'd think he would listen to me, wouldn't you, since I was older, actually had a job at the moment and graduated top of my class…in high school. But no, if he was going to follow me around all day asking every single doctor if they could "take a peek-a-peek at his stupid little sister," I was seriously going to have to stick him with something sharp. Maybe that needle from across the room. He'd probably break it before it even punctured skin, damn his military background, (as if they teach you how to avoid IV needles from angry doctors in the military.)

"Dr. Williams, are you alright?" I hadn't been paying attention, so when I looked up from the charts at my patient I smiled and nodded my head.

"Oh you're going to be just fine, just a few fractures," I told him, flipping my chart closed and feeling a sudden head rush. I blinked a couple of times and it seemed to go away.

"I was actually talking about you, doc. You look really pale, and as if your about to pass out." He repeated, worry written on his face as I tried to force a smile on mine.

"I keep telling her to see a doctor but will she listen to me? The guy whose seen other peoples feet blown off? No, she won't," Steve had been sitting next to me, in the chair meant for my patients family member, if he had any.

"Just the feet really?"

"Totally, but does my big sister listen to someone who has seen all of this and knows danger by the scent of it?"

The scent of danger, what the…

"Steve if you do not shut the hell up, I _will _stick you with that needle…" Steve jumped up, extending his arms so he could catch me as I stumbled over. I hadn't even realized I had fallen until Steve was catching me. I blinked a couple of times before realizing that my vision was a little skewed as well.

"Can we get a doctor in here?!" Steve yelled, trying to keep me hoisted off the ground. You'd think he'd be able to, considering that he's massive and could lift an anvil if he tried really hard. I don't weigh more than an anvil, and if I did, I doubt I be passing out due to food poisoning. Can you say heart attack?

"I am a doctor you person," I heard myself mumble, most likely incoherently and rather sarcastically.

"Not you, although I really would love to see you diagnose this little problem your having." He told me, still looking out the door to see if anyone had heard his call for help. I could only see feet at this point and even then I couldn't focus on anything but the searing pain that had consumed what felt like my entire abdomen. That and the feel of strong, rough hands taking the place of Steve's were the only things I remembered after that. In fact they felt really rough for doctor's hands.

There's something oddly comforting about an out of body experience. I had never had one before so I don't know if I was hyped on medicine and having odd dreams or if I actually was having an out of body experience. Everything seemed too real to be a dream, and I swore the janitor was hovering over me too, next to Steve as he sat next to the hospital bed.

"I swear her eyes are moving back there," the janitor spoke, causing some else in the room to scoff lightly.

"Nice observation, genius, you want do the post op exam as well? She's probably dreaming." Dr. Cox's voice cut through, mumbling his annoyance at the janitor.

"When do you think she'll wake up?" Steve's voice was next, again stirring a sigh of agitation from Dr. Cox's throat.

"You could always wait and see, there's pretty much isn't a way I can do that. Unless you've figured that out too, janitor?" I heard the sound of a pen scratching away at the paper Dr. Cox must've been writing on.

"Not yet, but I do have some schematics in the works for a forwards and backwards time machine…"

"Say Steve, you alright over there?" Dr. Cox asked, again, his voice only slightly affected by the idea of being nice to my little brother.

"You know, I did tell her to see a doctor. She kept saying it was food poisoning, and of course I just let her walk around as if she was right, because you know she is a doctor."

"You shouldn't blame yourself for your sister's stupidity. Emergency appendectomies happen all the time, it's not like she _could_ actually diagnose herself, she's just very stubborn and dumb for not listening to you."

I had to admit I was being a little foolish in the idea that I didn't listen to my brother. However, how the hell I was supposed to know that the reason I threw up this morning was because I had to have my appendix removed? Either way, I'm sure that Steve was just looking out for me, but did Dr. Cox have to call me stubborn? Probably…

"What the hell? Hey somebody get Gandhi in here." If I could've raised my eyebrows curiously, I would've. I heard Steve shift next to me, hankering a curiousity of his own. "Can you explain why your giving her this, instead of, oh I don't know, something I actually prescribed her?" I wanted to raise my eyebrows even further.

"Isn't that what you're supposed to do?" I could just see Turk's face, it would've been the same look I would've had on my face.

"Yes, for children and women who are pregnant." Dr. Cox sounded just as confused as I felt. Or maybe those were the stitches, I couldn't tell.

"Right," Turk sounded unsure of himself as he answered Dr. Cox and my metaphorical eyes widened. I heard the metal chart slap shut and Dr. Cox take a deep breath as he thought about Turk's words.

Hot Biscuit!!


	9. Chapter 9: My Two Heartbeats

_**A/N: So its summer and i have a lot of free time since i've been searching for a job. But, still it gives me time to catch up on some of my stories. I hope you enjoy this chapter. so read it. Now. i own nothing. **_

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Chapter Nine: My Two Heartbeats

You know that feeling when you just want to crawl into your own skin and die? Yeah, me too. At this current moment in time, as the three men stood over me, in my hospital room, I couldn't think of anything that I wanted to more. However, as much as I wanted to attempt the physically impossible, there wasn't anything I could do about it, besides ditch my out of body experience and fall back to sleep. I couldn't remember much about what I dreamed. Although I do remember plastic dolls, lots and lots of plastic dolls, at least they weren't porcelain, I hate porcelain. That's another long story; I don't feel like dwelling on it.

I would much rather dwell on the fact that I'm quite possibly, more than likely, 99.99% pregnant. Now, it's not too bold to say that I'm a smart person. I made sure that while I was on these sexual escapades with Dr. Cox, we used protection. The fact of the matter is, I shouldn't have slept with Dr. Cox in the first place. I should've listened to my better judgment the first time and taken a cab home. But, because my better judgment was drunk of its ass, I couldn't tell which way was up at the time, let alone tell if someone was getting into my pants.

So, really, I should blame it on the alcohol. I feel the need to express that although I'm going through a bit of a crisis, I love that song. Maybe there was some truth to it. We literally should blame it on the alcohol. If we both hadn't been so drunk, maybe we would've had our common sense to not crawl into bed with one another. That could easily be blamed for the first hookup. I have no idea on how I was going to explain our second encounter. I'll just let that one disappear.

"Sadie? Are you awake?" I opened my eyes to Steve's face as he looked at me curiously. I looked around the room. It was empty except for the two of us. He sat back once he saw that I had awoken, and leaned his elbows on the side of my bed.

"How long have I been sleeping?" It seemed like the thing to ask; all the patients ask the question on all those TV shows.

"About 12 hours, how do you feel?" He asked, he was trying not to look me in the face, for what reason I have no idea.

"I don't know, a little nauseas, I guess. You look tired, you should go home." I sighed, watching as my hospital room door flew open and Dr. Cox was standing in the frame, trying to figure out how he was going to approach me. Steve turned back to look at him, a scowl forming on his face as he moved to get up, grabbing my car keys from the bed side table.

"You're right, I should. I'm just going to take a nap; I'll be back in a while." He mumbled before leaving, awkwardly shuffling past Dr. Cox. I raised my eyebrows as I curiously watched the door frame where Dr. Cox was still standing, trying to figure out if he was going to enter the room or not. I didn't care. I slowly pulled myself up enough so I could see out the window, although it wasn't the best view. By the time I had completed this task, Dr. Cox was already at the side of my bed, just checking my chart before he cleared his throat.

"How do you feel?" He asked, not bothering to look up as he continued to write.

"I've been better." I replied, returning my gaze to the window.

"Any, er, nausea?"

"Just a little, nothing I can't control." I told him, turning in time to see him shift uncomfortably.

"How about your stitches, are those bothering you at all?"

"No, everything's fine, thanks." I nodded, trying to force a small smile as he looked back up at me. That's when I saw it, a very evident, dark purplish circle around his right eye. I eyed it carefully before I noticed other small cuts and scrapes around his face. He must have noticed what I was looking at because he quickly shut his chart and stared down at me.

"We need to talk," He began, again trying to figure out how he was going to approach our current situation. I took a deep breath and waited patiently.

There was a deep awkward silence and it seemed to last until, thank the lord, JD popped in. I think it was safe to say, that even Perry was happy to see him walk through the doors, happily strutting towards my bed.

"Look at you two, there's an awkward silence floating around, you both refuse to look at each other in the face, isn't the miracle of life fantastic?" He mused, sitting on the edge of my bed to speak as we both stared back at him.

"Charlotte, I'm not even going to begin to list all the things that I could do to you if you don't leave right now." JD didn't even have to think about the consequences if he stayed in the room, he was out in seconds.

"Can I ask what happened to your face?" I couldn't stand being in the utter dark any more. He just looked at me, though, pursing his lips as he looked at me.

"We're obviously not going to address the bigger picture are we?" He continued, crossing his arms.

"I don't like the reference to the word "bigger" in this conversation."

"What?"

"Bigger, it implies to more than just…you know what, never mind." I sighed, trying to remain calm. It was lot harder than it was supposed to be, Dr. Cox wasn't helping much. He still wasn't answering my initial question.

"Alright, two things, one: we still need to discuss the big problem and two: this was because of you." I frowned as he pointed to his face.

"Just to bypass any awkwardness, and the fact that I'm taking this whole thing incredibly well, I'm going to address both of those points with one statement. So, the fact that your face looks like you slammed it into the corner of a table, is because I'm pregnant?"

"I don't remember telling you that was the problem." Dr. Cox raised his eyebrows as I shrugged my shoulders.

"Instinctively, there had to have been another reason why I felt so sick yesterday, besides that, I overheard your conversation with Turk." I nodded, not bothering to look him in the face as I explained. He took a deep breath and stuffed his hands in his lab coat pockets, nodding as I looked up at him.

"So, what's the plan?" It seemed awkward as we both sat in silence for several minutes. It seemed like neither of us wanted to confront the reality of what was happening. Truth be told, as I sat calm and collected on the outside, on the inside I was screaming my lungs out. There was not possible way this could be happening.

I couldn't imagine myself pregnant, of all the things I imagined myself one of them was not impregnated by a doctor I almost completely hate. But then again, maybe I didn't hate him as much as I thought I did. Even if I was at the point where the very presence of the man didn't piss me off to the point of no return, I still wasn't prepared to brave all and jump into having a child with the man.

"Sorry to interrupt, but, Sadie you have an appointment upstairs." Carla slid into the room, looking flush as if she were afraid to interrupt our nonexistent conversation. I furrowed my eyebrows and glanced at her as she wheeled a wheel chair to the side of my bed.

"What appointment?" I asked, looking up at Perry as he took another deep breath.

"I was gonna get there." He mumbled as he just stepped aside and watched Carla help me into the chair.

"You have an appointment to see your baby for the first time, isn't that exciting?" She asked me, waiting to look back to urge Dr. Cox to follow. I furrowed my eyebrows as I thought of an answer to her question.

"Depends on the technician doing my exam," I mumbled as Carla giggled. There was no reason to giggle, I wasn't joking. It all really did depend on the technician, and of course, Perry's attitude during the whole thing.

I was trying not to look all the other nurses and doctors in the face as Carla wheeled me through the hospital. I wasn't sure what rumors had been spread, and what variety of truth was applied to those rumors. Either way, I wasn't sure what kind of looks they were going to give me. It was always different being on the other side of the spectrum, being the patient instead of the doctor.

"Alright, I'll let you take it from here," Carla had turned to Perry, making him take the handles of my wheel chair and wheel me into the dark examination room. Again an awkward silence fell the both of us as I sat on the table, a bit of al fresco situation causing a permanent red flush to spread across my cheeks. I popped my head up as the door opened and the doctor walked in. Relieved it wasn't an ex-boyfriend, I relaxed a little. How awkward would that be? My last boyfriend probably doesn't even work at Sacred Heart any more, which is a good thing. I didn't need him to be rubbing it in my face.

The doctor didn't address me personally, but instead turned to ask questions of Dr. Cox who answered them quickly. I smiled as the doctor eyed me, sighing a little as she prepped the machine.

"So, what, er, are we going to do about this whole situation?" I asked, as the doctor still fiddled around with the machine. Dr. Cox didn't answer and I was left in silence to dwell in my own thoughts. I stared up at the ceiling for what seemed like forever before I heard it.

It was a low thumping, fast paced and indistinguishable at first, but as soon as I heard it my own heart sank. It was the good kind of sinking, the sinking you feel when something amazing happens. I turned to the doctor, who didn't say anything as she smiled at me, she didn't have to. This moment was amazing enough that she didn't have to say anything. I couldn't hear Dr. Cox and I didn't even care if he said anything. I felt him at my side, listening to the fast paced rhythm in silence as I came to my own decision.

"I'm keeping it…"


End file.
